Fourteen years ago I was living with a roommate in an apartment close to where I worked and attended church. I had come to the conclusion that God was going to be my only husband for the rest of my life since there were no good men left in the world. I was content with that, but I hadn't always been. For years I'd harbored the dream of being swept off my feet by Prince Charming.

By the age of 28 I had seen lots of toads and not one prince.

One Sunday I was getting ready for church and decided to wear a new dress. I remember looking in the mirror and saying, "Lord, I sure would like for my husband to see me in this new dress." I'll never forget hearing the Holy Spirit's answer: "He will."

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Companions play awesome role in the life of every servant. This is clearly the intent of both Jesus and the Father. Therefore it is crucial that we recognize whom God is sending to us, and why.

Jesus knew whom God had granted to Him and why. He said to His Father, "'I have manifested Your name to the men whom You have given Me out of the world. They were Yours, You gave them to Me, and they have kept Your Word. Now they have known that all things which You have given Me are from You. For I have given to them the words which You have given Me; and they have received them, and have known surely that I came forth from You; and they have believed that You sent Me'" (John 17:6-8, NKJV).

The principle of companionship in the kingdom of God remains the same to this day. It is important to be able to recognize when God is sending you a companion or providing you with a dear friend, colleague, or co-worker to help you along the way.

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It was 4:10 a.m., and the phone was ringing. I knew it was "the call." A dispassionate female voice announced mechanically: "Mr. LeSourd expired shortly after 4 a.m. I'm very sorry."

I lay in our bed, stunned at what I'd just learned. Len had been very ill for several weeks. But he wasn't supposed to die so soon--or at all.

We'd been blessed with 10 beautiful years of marriage and an extraordinary partnership as editor-author, conference speakers and prayer ministers. We were a team, working and playing together. A friend's remark about us never failed to rouse a chuckle: "Len taught Sandy how to work, and Sandy taught Len how to play."

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Every woman has endured one kind of heartbreak or another. We've all had the unfortunate experience of betrayal, and we've grieved over the difficulty of getting past it. As Christian women, how do we process the hurts we go through? And where is our God in the midst of them?

In the book of 2 Samuel, King David's daughter Tamar suffered an unspeakable violation at the hands of her brother Amnon, who afterward, rejected her and cast her away. The Scripture says: "Tamar put ashes on her head and tore the ornamented robe she was wearing. She put her hand on her head and went away, weeping aloud as she went" (2 Sam. 13:19, NIV). 

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Indulging in a steamy romance novel…going out of your way to pass by the attentive co-worker's desk…surfing in cyberspace to find a chat room buddy who'll stroke your ego. None of these seemingly innocent activities could be considered cheating or sexually compromising, right? Or could they?

Where is the line between sexual integrity and compromise? What constitutes marital unfaithfulness? Can we consider ourselves “pure” as long as we've not been physical with another man? Or, does sexual purity go deeper than that?

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To my surprise, I've remained single far longer than I ever expected or wanted to. As the years have progressed, I have found myself increasingly challenged by the need for answers to the tough things I was facing. Unfortunately, resources to help me and those like me have been few.

It is good for us to want others in our lives whom we love and who love us. But I have found it difficult, as a single, to sustain the level of relationship with other people I believe God wants me to have.

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Marijean (not her real name) had just broken her engagement to a successful businessman, who turned out to have serious moral failings. She was 31, and looking for real solutions to some of the relationship dilemmas many singles face, so she began regularly visiting a home Bible study I attended that addressed singles issues.

One evening on the drive home, she coyly asked me this question: "What is the procedure if someone is attracted to another person in the Bible study?" Gulp. I searched my mind for a file called "procedure," but found none. "Well," I said, finally, "they could try and mingle over cookies and juice at the end of the evening." That was the best I could offer, and I knew it was lame.

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As a 45-year-old single woman, I have had my share of surprises and struggles. In my late 20s, I was surprised by how few resources there were to help me maneuver through the challenges I was experiencing as a single adult.

I discovered there were numerous books on dating and books that centered on contentment as a single, but I couldn't find much that addressed the tough things I faced day to day. More importantly, I couldn't find any books that simply validated what I was feeling.

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Why aren't you married?" has to be the single most asked question I get at this point in my life. What does a person mean when he poses this question?

Is he really asking me, "What is wrong with you?" It sure feels like it!

Although I usually give a polite response such as, "I am just waiting on God," what I really want to shout at the top of my lungs is: "To tell you the truth--I don't know. But I am not really worried about it. I am happy just the way I am. Now leave me alone!"

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